“What is the tangible expression of daring to hope?” Robbie asks, backlit by a stained glass sunset glow.
We are gathered. Some of us sit upright in chairs, some have their feet up, and some are lying down. Matti’s head is on Brooke’s lap. Several of us are on the carpet, whose earthy smell I’ll always remember from having my face pressed into it. Teagan reclines with her journal open. I am seated on the steps beside Dave, Tyler, Joy, and Corey.
“And make it personal,” Robbie says. “What has daring to hope looked like in your life?”
I put my Bible down. That’s one of my favorite things Robbie reminds us to do - make it personal. Because as much as I love to paint essays of who you are, gluing shards of your beauty to words, you are only ever interested in making your glory personal to us. You desire that all of your magnificence flow into relationship with me, a small frame.
It feels so immense. Suddenly I am even more a child, even more wide-eyed than I would have been had I kept my Bible open and preached about you. I remember that even you, the Word, became flesh. I look back in shivering awe at how your word took on the flesh of my life. You rescued us from the domain of darkness - but you rescued me from the domain of darkness. It looked like a Friday afternoon in a stained glass chapel. Robbie says he still remembers where I sat, the beanie I was wearing. It looked like home. It looked like family. The kingdom of the beloved Son.
“I don’t recognize the person I used to be,” I tell those gathered. “I don’t even recognize the Jesus I used to worship. He’s so much more.”
It’s one thing to say it, even to believe it, but it’s another thing to touch it. My Dallas family touched you yesterday. They touched you as they soaked in morning sun and fresh mountain air coming through the open church doors. They touched you as they held familiar strangers and locked eyes with new brothers and sisters and mothers and fathers. They touched you as they felt an atmosphere of love. They called it an open heaven. Not by might, nor by power, but by your Spirit bursting forth from everyone gathered - a river of living water.
Who are you, King of Glory? What is this you’ve done in my life?
Such a scandal. I’m blushing, lovesick. I’m blushing, watching you woo me as I watch Mike give Liz a word, as I watch Robbie hug Ashley, as I watch Jordan and Matti laugh together. You know how to romance me. I’ve fallen headlong for you.